Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
We have so much sex to catch up on
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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