How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
