Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
