recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
