Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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