In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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