North Korea, Best Korea!
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
