Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
