Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize