i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
wow bdsm is so cute
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
