the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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