Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I use my feet as sexual weapons
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
