am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize