He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
