Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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