He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
