I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize