So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
only you would photoshop your dick
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
