What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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