you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize