Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I have post one night stand depression
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