Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
