dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
