New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize