I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize