The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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