Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize