is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
