Me too!
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
