It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
