I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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