I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.