She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
