Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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