You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
