I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize