We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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