i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
