I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
im holly from the hills drunk
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Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
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