Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
3pm strippers are depressing
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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