i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
