i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
