Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
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