My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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