then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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