A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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