that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
