playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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