butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
