never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
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I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
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Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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