what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
